Mindi wrote:
Giving an A is so much harder than it sounds. I know. I tried. More than once. I started with my husband, but that failed miserably, so I tried on someone else. Myself. As a teacher, I understand the impact the grade can have on a student and I resent the institution of grades for comparing every single child to every other child out there. Yet, as a student, I thrive for the A. Because it is part of the ridiculous plan i have invented for my life. Then, again, as a teacher, i strive to create a safe environment for my students where they are free to make mistakes and learn from them and fail and succeed multiple times in a day. Yet, as a student, failure is not an option. I have gone through the last 10 months with a perfect average. Something I knew I was capable of but never achieved in my educational career. A couple of months ago, that average was in severe jeopardy of being tarnished. And I was devastated. I had already convinced myself that the project I produced wasn’t good enough (for my invented standards) and thus convinced myself that I might get a B. Heaven forbid. In hindsight, it was ridiculous because although I had earned an A in every single class up to that point, I had never truly given myself an A. And that’s actually quite embarrassing. I can see in my future that I will celebrate my mistakes and failures and say, “How fascinating!” but I’m not quite there yet. Maybe after month 12!
My response:
Mindi,
I feel the same way you do at times about not giving yourself an A. I think also that many teachers push their students to meet standards because they feel that it is a reflection on them as an individual. However, I think we miss the reason for giving an A. It is so the teacher/boss/etc. and the student/employee/etc. can meet the standards that are place on them as a unit and not worry about the standard or divide created by grades or evaluations.
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